I’m really struggling to put my writing first. I’ve had family in town to deal with some medical issues, which means a lot of people in a little house. Plus I’ve had to relinquish my computer to my house guests, which makes it even tougher to write. On the one hand, I want to give myself some slack. After all, the attention required to keep the rest of my life balanced means that maybe writing has to take a back seat for a little while. On the other hand, writing is incredibly important to me, and I feel as if failing to commit to writing each and every day means I’m not as serious about things as I need to be. As of right now I’m not sure which point of view is correct. I suspect it’s a blend of both and I’m being too easy and too hard on myself at the same time.
I’ve also realized that my computer isn’t quite cutting it anymore. It’s seven years old, after all, and the power supply is nearly dead. I’ve found that nothing reinvigorates writing like a brand new toy to write on, so hopefully this fall I’ll be able to make that happen and update all my files.
At least thinking about my story has given me a nice escape from the daily stress. I think about one of my main characters, what his life was like before my novel begins, and what sort of changes have taken place between then and where the story currently is. I’m trying to sort out the various rituals that governed his early life, and how exactly he was shaped by his friends and competitors to become the man he is. During such exercises I’m reminded how every single one of my characters is simultaneously me and utterly alien. I think that’s one of the things that makes me love writing.
Another thing I love is the prospect to reach people. Someone from my fanfic days commented here recently, and her post made my day. Whether my stories are merely entertainment, or provide an escape, or touch a reader’s heart, or help them gain perspective, it means so incredibly much to me to be able to touch others. I hope that as the years go by and I hone my skills, that will only increase. I may write alone, most of the time, but it still makes me feel very much connected to my life and the lives of others.